Genetic deafness.

"Huh? What? Oh, no. I think I'm losing my hearing like my father."

Oh, is that what I have to look forward to?

"I've told you before, men don't get more lovely with time."

I'm looking forward to repeating myself two and three times.

"I'm looking forward to the quietness."

Tax Time

"Who do I make this check out to?"

Me: I don't know, it should say it on your tax filing form.

"Oh right, Indiana Department of Revenue...and Bastards".

Me: I think they'd still cash it.

Yeah, that's EXACTLY what I want to do with my time.

"You can be a crafty woman once you have your time back, you could like...dust and shit."

Giving me suggestions on what I can do with all my time once I am no longer commuting 3 hours a day.

5 leaf clovers

"To be honest, there are far more 5 leaf clovers than there are beds that I've had sex in."

Stated when we were talking about the girl he dated before me, and I asked him if he had sex with her in the bed we now share together (because I think I would burn it!).

Whitewater rafting

"Dating you is like white water rafting...scary as hell, but intensely rewarding."

Killing Dreams

Boyfriend: "Wouldn't it be lovely to own a dairy farm and make cheese."
Me: Have you ever worked on a farm? It's hard work!
Boyfriend: "Way to kill my dreams. Any others you can kill?"
Me: I don't know, keep pitching them, and I'll knock them down one by one.
Boyfriend: "Astronaut?"
Me: You're too old. Go on.

Proper Filing

Me: I would never go in a hot air balloon. Never.
Boyfriend: "Why not?"
Me: I'm deathly afraid of heights.
Boyfriend: "Oh yeah, you keep telling me that, and I keep filing it away under Don't Give A F#ck."